The Diary

12 March 2008: Tonight's Results: The Good, The Bad, And The Just Plain Ugly!

Oh, dear ? I really will have to cease and desist this armchair-bound footie-following lark, and as soon as practicable, too. It?s not doing our nerves any good at all, believe you me. OK ? no direct Albion involvement to be had tonight, but plenty happening in the Championship otherwise capable of poking a giant-size spoke right into the works. That?s why we both stayed glued to our TV screen, and the Sky latest scores service, from around 7.45 this evening just gone. 4p One result genuinely astonished me: Barnsley, pitched against Ipswich, winning on their own muck-heap. And what a margin they racked up, too, 4-1, it was, when the ref finally blew for time. Well, after the almighty hoo-ha of their astonishing Cup victory over Chelski, last Saturday, would YOU have wanted to put serious money on them getting a result tonight?

As far as I was concerned, an ?After The Lord Mayor?s Show?-type scenario seemed the most likely outcome of the lot, and it certainly looked as though it was heading that way at Oakwell, when Ipswich scored first. But despite that early setback, the Tykes finally got their act together, and in the end gave the Tractor Boys a right old stonking they wouldn?t forget in a hurry.

One of the most significant results of the night, though, was bloody Stoke?s squeaky-bum win at Carrow Road, which put them second in the heap, and had me nearly tearing my bloody hair right out, courtesy the sudden release of 90-minutes worth of pent up fury and frustration, when the final score hit our TV screen. Blimey, you might have hoped Delia would see to it their pre-match nibbles would get spiked with something pathogenic, wouldn?t you? I dunno ? you simply can?t get the board members bursting with malice aforethought, these days. Come back Robert Chase, all is forgiven!

Bristol City, currently top, entertained Watford, third, and that one finished totally bloodless, which was about the best scenario that could have been expected from our point of view, I suppose, The Robins still sitting pretty on their lofty perch, and the Vicarage Road mob conveniently (for us) dropping what would have been a useful couple of points in the family vault for them.

That means we?re now two behind them, but with a couple of games in hand to play with, still. Burnley were victorious against Charlton, who still have 56 points to their credit, five behind us and with two games extra played, which means there?s now a bit of a ?cushion? opening up between them and us.

But we do have to play them at their place in around ten days time, so plenty of scope there for things to go pear-shaped, still. It being one of life?s most boring away journeys ever, I hadn?t originally planned to go, but given everything that?s happened recently, and what?s potentially at stake, I suppose I?ll have to ignore my better instincts, for once, and go book a ticket ASAP.

Hull, who didn?t play tonight? They have the ?pleasure? ? if that?s how you want to see it: the sheer volatility, not to mention bellicosity, of our Welsh counterparts is legendary ? of hosting fellow FA Cup semi-finallists Cardiff tomorrow evening. At least we can turn up for our own Hawthorns love-in with Neil Warnock?s Crystal Palace side knowing that a victory against the Sarf Londoners (not to mention uber-cantankerous chum Colin!) would do our own bid for automatic promotion absolutely no harm at all.

Oh ? and stonking great sniggers all round, please, for the Dingles, who had their own play-off prospects, already in serious danger of fading irretrievably even before tonight?s away game with Preston kicked off, made even more unlikely when the Deepdale mob took the lead pretty late in the game. Then held it until the final whistle, which must have had them drumming on their chests something awful in the away end, what? And all that after our cerebrally-challenged chums started whooping it up earlier in the game because they?d taken the lead first! Oh dear. Taxi for McCarthy, anyone?

The other, slightly-related, issue at stake tonight? The small matter of my other half?s ?supplementary? outfit, Hereford, journeying to Mansfield this evening, and finishing the game with yet another three points credited to their account. That win puts them back into the promotion places once more, and what a time to manage it, too.

Three go up automatically in Division Two, remember, with the usual four play-off places up for grabs as well - which means there?s a shed-load of hellish bumping and barging still going on in order to materially improve contenders? prospects of inclusion in that ?charmed? top seven, come the end of the season. Just like in our division, there?s several sides out there still capable of doing it, besides the Bulls, so I can?t really see the fat lady bursting into song in that neck of the woods for quite some time to come.

Turning to matters much closer to home, finally, what news is there to be had of our crop of ?wounded soldiers?, after Sunday?s wonderfully-crafted FA Cup win over Bristol Rovers? After all, we do have a significant League game to play in less than 24 hours, so it really would be nice to see our lot take to the field of play not materially disadvantaged by any painful bumps or bangs amassed through any over-enthusiasm, on our part.

Our major injury doubt, at this late stage, seems to be Carl Hoefkens, who is still struggling with the hamstring injury he sustained at Hillsborough last week, apparently. (The Express And Dingle seem to think he won?t make it at all.)

But having seen his exciting performance at the Memorial Ground last Sunday evening, coping with players with far more experience under their belts than he, and in a situation so pressure-packed at times, the safety valve looked dangerously close to blowing the entire lid off, I would have no compunction whatsoever in seeing young Jared Hodgkiss continue to impress in that slot. Although Rovers didn?t come down as heavily upon our intrepid travelling band as I?d expected, coping with their otherwise robust style last Sunday wasn?t, by any means, as easy as some might have originally thought.

As Mogga said in Albion?s pre-match press conference: ?Before Sunday, Jared had been out for some four or five weeks after a hernia operation, and had only played some 57 minutes for the reserves four days earlier. It was a gamble to put him in, and he did exceptionally well, and I?m delighted for the boy?..?

Things should also be hotting up through Shergar being returned to The Hawthorns at our request, and now presumably on standby should any more players in the squad fall by the wayside for any reason. Mind you, if what the club?s own website says is kosher, then we might just end up having to include him in the squad. This has all the makings of a ticklish dilemma for Mogga: to retain, or to chuck out on loan again? Considerations could also enter the realm of the financially-advantageous, in the short-to-medium term view: just about every lower division club currently needing a proven goal-getter now wants to have ownership of young Shergar, if only on a temporary basis!

?Lots of clubs are interested in taking Sherjill on loan,? said Mogga to the media, yesterday. ?We?ll address the situation with our squad, and readdress before the loan window closes whether we?re going to send him out again, or keep him on board. He?s a young footballer who has been away, and scored a lot of goals??.but he?s got to get back training with our squad and compete to try and get into our team.

?I will assess in training whether he?s got a chance of doing that??As I?ve said all along, he?s got unbelievable talent and ability??.But, with total respect to Hereford, the Championship is a different league to the one he was playing in.?

That?s the pr?cis of what our gaffer said about the lad?s prospects, then. Will we supporters ever see The Great Shergar Comeback, or will Mogga simply loan him out again? I know what Supporters Club head honcho John Homer thinks of the situation, given he?s still got the threat of having to run around Lower Gornal in his birthday suit hanging over his shiny little head, should Shergar knock one in for the Baggies.

As for Jean Homer and I, let?s just say that we?re both crossing fingers galore, in great expectation that before he does go, if he does, the lad might just give us both the opportunity of having the laugh of a lifetime at Mister Homer?s expense!

Other news relevant to tomorrow?s vitally-important meet with Palace? Nothing else seems to be amiss on the medical front, so I guess he?ll simply go with what he had at his disposal on Sunday evening. Having said that, he might well tinker around a bit with which players he gives a start, and which he rests on the bench.

I wonder whether Kev Phillips might put himself forward for a spell in the early shift, partnering young Ish Miller, maybe? Or will he stick with the Miller-Bednar combo he started with at Bristol? And we?ve still got Luke Moore to fit in with our requirements, of course. Personally, I don?t think he?s properly adapted to the differing requirements of the Championship, as yet, but I?m sure that won?t be too long in coming.

News from Warnock?s place? Palace captain Mark Hudson had a little spat with Colin last weekend ? something about a contract dispute, apparently ? so The Warlock?s Curse may possibly descend upon him yet again. If he?s not on the team-sheet, be on the look out for a toad-like creature hopping around Halfords Lane.

With the above forcing our hero to use his great clunking fist in order to Return Discipline To What It Should Be Again, he took the step, quite brave, really, of bringing in someone with limited experience to take the place of the Fallen One, a lad called Lee Hills. And he?s not the only young lad getting the chance to show his worth in front of The Warlock: also in the frame for inclusion, either from the start, or on the bench, are Victor Moses, Ashley Robinson, and Sean Scannell.

Probably out because of injury are Neil Danns and former Dingle midfielder Mark Kennedy (who would have got loads of abuse anyway, so maybe it?s a blessing in disguise, in that instance!) Palace people claim that there are three players who could poop on our semi-final party quite easily: Clinton Morrison, James Scowcroft, and Ben Watson.

Our chances of getting anything from this game? Under normal circumstances, I would have rated our chances ?very good indeed?. But what we will have out there WON?T be ?normal circumstances?, not by any stretch of the imagination whatsoever. The entry of our gladiators into the arena will most likely sound like a cross between the filming of a Cecil B De Mille Roman era epic, and a Nuremberg Rally where all the participants have been given copious amounts of cocaine in powder form to ?snort? beforehand.

And we all know how Colin would dearly like to put a metaphorical spanner in the works by grabbing all three points in his greasy little hand. As I?ve said so many times before, this current campaign, an awful lot will depend upon the calibre of refereeing we get out there: it?s my genuine belief that our more talented players don?t always get the proper protection to which they should be entitled. A quick tootle onto the League?s website tells me we?ve got a certain P Walton doing the biz with the whistle. But get this, you guys?. Our fourth official? None other than a certain Mister MILLER! AAAARGH! Now just keep telling me, everyone, ?There?s not an awful lot a fourth official can do to totally screw up a game!.......?

And Finally?. One. When I looked on the Palace website earlier on, I encountered a curious headline, viz: ?There will be a warm glow present at the Hawthorns when Palace take on West Brom in the Championship (tomorrow night)?? Coo! Does that mean Colin?s going to resort to arson, in order to ensure he puts paid to us for once and for all?

Two?. And now for a bit of good honest Dingle-bashing?. Trolling through the pages of the ?Express And Dingle? last night, after catching up on the report of Sunday?s game, I couldn?t help but notice a news item informing readers (yes, there are some in Wolverhampton ? and what?s more, they?ve all got certificates to prove it, and in nice big helpful letters, too!) that a party of Wolves players were scheduled to open a new primary school in the area. Situated, appropriately enough, given the general tone of the area, in Noose Lane. What I really want to know, though, is this: Which Dingle player has been given the job of picking the locks to the entrance?

Three?. And a bit more, just because I?m feeling a bit spiteful tonight, so there! According to one match report emanating from last weekend?s drawn game with Southampton at Molineux, after the final whistle, there was a bit of a fight in the home dressing room. Next week?s tabloid headline? ?SHOCK DISCOVERY OF SAND IN SAUDI ARABIA!?

 - Glynis Wright

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