The Diary

04 December 2006: That FA Cup Draw: How Was It For You, Then?

Greetings once more, you lot. I?m writing this after having sat through one of the most fascinating and compelling pieces of TV I?ve seen over the course of recent weeks: no, not the FA Cup draw - although that did have its dramatic moments - just The Beeb?s hour-long look at ?Casualty?, but instead of seeing Josh, Charlie and all the rest of ?em hard at work patching up the good (but exceedingly accident-prone!) people of the fictional Holby City, they went for a retrospective look at a similar East London hospital department at work exactly 100 years ago, every single scene culled from extensive Emergency, outpatients? department, and ward Occurrence Book records made at the time.

Just think: no NHS: hospitals treating the poor largely dependent upon charitable donations to survive: no antibiotics to cure common infections like pneumonia: X-rays in their infancy (and the long-term dangers of overexposure yet to be fully realised): nurses who ran the risk of romance with young doctors knowing full well that to ?fraternise? was a disciplinary offence, and could quite easily result in dismissal. Should it be repeated, I would recommend you watch it ? then count your blessings afterwards.

Talk of ?counting one?s blessings? immediately brings me to the subject of today?s FA Cup draw, that took place directly after the Beeb?s live Second Round tie involving Salisbury Town, of the Conference South, and Nottingham Forest ? how many of you spotted Scott Dobie performing in their ranks, by the way? - of the Second Division. The relative disparity in status between the two sides amounted to a chasm-like three divisions on paper, of course, but Salisbury certainly acquitted themselves very well, coming from behind in the middle of the second half to take the former European giants to a City Ground replay. And, as we Baggies already know to our cost ? Woking and Tim Buzaglio, anyone? ? nothing in that ancient competition is ever a ?given? or what our Transatlantic cousins would very likely call a ?slam-dunk certainty?. Although the game now switches to their own bit of real-estate, it would certainly behove the East Midlands club very well indeed to do their homework carefully beforehand, and not fall victim to complacency.

So what did you think about what we got in the subsequent draw, then? I must confess that as the pile of black balls still remaining in that enormous pot they used got smaller, the more my gut instincts twitched ?Hereford?: with two-thirds of the draw having come and gone, both outfits stubbornly defied extraction, still. As for schizophrenic hubby, the more pairings that emerged, so did his larynx further undergo vocal contortions of a sort not recognised by most medical texts. That I understand, because as far as clubs in that neck of the woods are concerned, getting as far as the Third Round represents, in its own way, progress commensurate with that of bigger outfits reaching, say, the quarter-final stage, or beyond that, even. The serious prize money begins once that magic milestone is reached, of course.

Once the respective fates of both clubs were finally decided, I reckon players and supporters alike would have been left reasonably content with their lot. As far as we?re concerned, the draw could have panned out much, much worse than it actually did: Leeds United, at our place, Ken Bates, Denis Wise and all who sail in them? Yeah ? I?ll take it. And you never know, I might even persuade John Peckham, a Leeds-supporting chum of ours, to come and have a couple of jars with us, either before or afterwards. The last time both clubs were paired in the competition was season 1978-79, in a fourth round jobbie.

We should have played ?em at Elland Road, actually, but their supporters had been very naughty boys and girls not so very long before, an act of real stupidity that resulted in their ground being declared closed by the FA as a punishment, hence the switch to a home tie. The final score? A 3-3 draw, our goals coming from Laurie Cunningham, Ally Brown and Cyrille Regis, but eventually winning the replay 2-0, the brace coming in extra time courtesy John Wile, and Ally Brown again. Sure, I know that League results mean absolutely diddly-squat when taken within the context of a knockout tournament, but we should have the psychological upper-hand, having already put four past them at our place back in September, with but two coming from them by way of reply.

Hereford? Well, the proof of the pudding was in the sense of relative contentment that immediately appeared upon the mush of my other half ere it all came out in the wash ? or rather the chubby fingers of the two boxing types (the logic of why the FA chose to go with them, and not a brace of revered former footballing icons instead, totally escapes me right now!) actually doing the biz.

They have a home tie versus whoever emerges the final victor from Bournemouth and Bristol Rovers, and the way I see it, Rovers look considerably more likely to end up playing them than the home side. My understanding is that the South Coast outfit aren?t exactly enjoying a happy time of it, right now. A chronic inability to score goals is the fundamental problem, apparently, something I find quite surprising in a side fashioned by ex-Hereford and Baggies coach Richard O?Kelly.

Anyone out there remember the delightfully-entertaining Hereford side he and Tucka Trewick put together just a few seasons ago, the one that positively delighted in ripping other Conference sides apart away from home purely for fun? Through dint of travelling to various Bulls games with ?Im Indoors, I managed to see a couple of seven-nil wins achieved on alien turf, plus at least one six-goal jobbie. And an unbelievable NINE goals scored in one memorable game played away from home while watching The Bulls on Sky.

With ?previous? like that, you?d have thought that the bookies would have refused to take bets on them going back into the League, which they duly did, considering the entire matter an odds-on cert ? but their play-off gallop (despite racking up an unbelievable number of goals ?for?, they eventually finished in runners-up spot to the all-conquering Chester City) coming seriously off the rails at the semi-final stage. Not through the other side outplaying them in any way, mind, just because of the unbelievable actions of one seriously-incompetent referee during the course of the second ?home? leg, in unnecessarily red-carding one Bull, then awarding a spot-kick to the other side that only existed as a work of complete and utter fiction. Oh ? and before ?Im Indoors gets his oar in first, I had to be woken up by him just as the draw was about to commence: yes, I know, it?s pretty difficult to doze off within the space of the brief time slot that separates actually watching a game from an important Cup draw held immediately afterwards, but I managed it, somehow!

So much for today?s happenings, then, so let us now move on to the pertinent question of what more I can possibly add to yesterday?s collection of vagrant Baggie thoughts regarding our hard-won victory over The Rams. From what our leader told assorted hacks at his post-match press conference yesterday, it?s now looking very much as though he?s about to ditch his previous ?entertainment at all cost? approach to the job, in favour of a much more pragmatic playing style. ?Sometimes, you just have to win," confessed ?yer man? to his audience. "I understand now that you have to earn the right to play by winning your individual battles ? once you have done that, your talent will come through. I?m still learning that this is a competitive league."

A real shame, that: no-one appreciates a job-lot of good, flowing football more than this column, but in some respects, he?s absolutely right. Playing a game based solely upon what Gary Megson once called ?tippy-tappy football? isn?t the way we?re going to get out of this division, although I still reserve the right to vigorously assert that sides can go with a largely entertaining footballing ethos, yet retain sufficient midfield and defensive steel within to end up doing the biz come the end of term. In recent seasons, Kevin Keegan?s Man City did it, and so did George Burley?s Ipswich. My fervent hope is that we don?t totally abandon our new-found ambitions of playing that way. There?s nothing worse for paying supporters than an endless succession of narrow victories, tediously ground out, and ending with all ten outfield players getting behind the ball once the killer goal?s finally been potted. Megson and a few others apart, that?s never really been the Albion tradition.

And what of that unlikeliest of Albion last-gasp goal heroes, a certain John Hartson? What?s really surprised me about the various bits of reportage I?ve seen concerning our game, thus far, is various hacks? complete and utter frankness concerning what they perceive to be the problem that prevents our former Celtic lad from pulling on a striker?s shirt as a matter of course. ?Porky? is but one of the milder turns of descriptive phrase I?ve clapped eyes on today. And there?s worse. ?Looks as if he has spent his three weeks away from the action with an Achilles problem product-sampling for McDonalds? was how the Daily Mail, never the most politically-correct of publications even at the best of times, put it tonight.

As the previously-quoted account then went on to say, even our leader waxed particularly honest himself about Big John?s overall fitness and mobility yesterday. "He?s not someone who can afford to miss any training," said Mowbray with classic understatement, "He?s not going to be a super-athlete or run like the wind. But coming off the bench he can have a big impact for us." You can say that again, Mogga, especially when he happens to accidentally collide with either a team-mate, or some poor sod of an opposing player! I can just picture it now: ?How many was THAT on the Richter scale just now, Professor? Oh, dear ? tsunami warnings galore across the Pacific tonight, if they don?t follow football!?

Also quite remarkable was a recent local radio interview in which our leader laid out his personal short-to-medium-term plans for the side. In it, Mogga asserted there were still some players who didn?t exactly go a bundle on the new regime he was trying to put into place at the Hawthorns. Reading between the lines, it sounds to me very much as though an overall tightening-up of discipline has been undertaken since his arrival at the club. I?m also getting strong vibes that come January, some existing favourites, still unable to hack his methods, will be leaving by the nearest exit. Whether all that will be enough to turn our currently-flagging season around completely is another issue entirely. Mowbray reckons the subsequent transformation in our fortunes will be cataclysmic in nature, almost ? but I?m not going to hold my breath. Not just yet.

This being a week completely without Albion commitment, in the strictest sense of the phrase, I?m very unlikely to be ?producing? until the following weekend, but having said all that, we are going to be joining Sutton Branch in their annual Christmas culinary thrash this coming Wednesday evening, held, as per usual, in Richard Sneekes?s Wylde Green-based Italian gastronomic emporium. Should that event prove particularly memorable, I?ll have little alternative but to share my innermost thoughts concerning the event with you lot, then, won?t I?

And Finally?. I started tonight?s effort on what was very much a medical note, so I?ll finish in that way. Trolling through various bits of Baggies-related stuff after committing last night?s offering to cyberspace, I was subsequently quite shocked to learn that Ronnie Wallwork, recovering in hospital after having been stabbed no less than three times the other night, needed surgery lasting some NINE hours in order to properly stabilise his condition, and not six maximum, as previously thought. Now that?s a hell of a lot of ?operation? for anyone, whatever their fitness-levels, therefore his various medical problems must have looked pretty bad when first brought into theatre.

As I understand it, an awful lot of the work done to rectify the damage concerned extensive repairs to some severed tendons on his hand, a fiddly sort of job even at the best of times, and one more than likely involving extensive preservation work undertaken on badly damaged nerves and blood vessels alike. The lad must have needed a pretty fair amount of the sticky red stuff to replace that lost as a consequence of all those horrible injuries as well: in all, Our Ronnie?s been a very, very lucky Baggie. Having said that, according to the quotes I?ve seen thus far, once recovered, none of what?s happened should adversely affect his future playing career in any way.

And it seems I was right about the entire thing being down to love-rivalry, too: when I?d suggested that as the probable motive for the perpetrator, I?d not known anything more detailed about the precise circumstances leading up to the incident than anyone else. A few seconds-worth of checking out what the chief plod in charge of the investigation had to say about the matter soon put me right, though. Sometimes it?s not at all nice to see yourself proven right in the end. Poor sod: well, one thing?s for certain, it?ll be an awfully long time before we?ll see him perform on the football field again, so perhaps the best thing we can all do, right now, is collectively wish him well, and hope for a very speedy recovery.

 - Glynis Wright

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