The Diary

23 January 2006: These Foolish Things Remind Me Of You!

After yesterday?s embarrassment, you won?t be too surprised to hear I'm still snarling quite dreadfully - well, there's only so much idiocy and misery a person can reasonably assimilate over the course of just an hour and a half, isn?t there? - but tonight, what I'm going to try to do as well is put the whole thing into some form of rational and reasoned perspective. Sometimes, strong emotions - anger, frustration etc - can make us considerably blinder to the true picture than would normally be the case had things not gone so pear-shaped. Don?t worry too much, the involvement of strong emotions is not necessarily a destructive course to steer. It?s when such feelings gain the ascendancy at the expense of rational and reasoned argument that real caution has to be exerted.

So, what are my current thoughts, then? In what appears to be a horrible ?knee-jerk? reaction to recent events, some supporters, rightly or wrongly, are now verbally lashing out at Chairman Jeremy Peace, which I do think a tad unfair and unhelpful, personally. Football ? well, according to the media, at any rate ? is all about opinions, and all valid ones have to be given equal consideration for proper debate if we really are to be serious about assessing the current situation and ways of extricating the club from future relegation problems. The big problem that has yet to be properly addressed for me is how we, as a club, respond to yesterday's defeat. Because next Saturday is a blank one, that gives us a good ten days - until Charlton away - to quietly take stock of what's happened, then avow to learn the appropriate lessons involved, either on the training-ground or on the field of play.

It?s my firm belief we really do need to be somewhat more proactive in the transfer market than we have been of late, but not necessarily looking for players on a permanent basis. The crux of the matter is that we currently have several key players absent, sure, but only one because of fairly long-term injury. Like Arnie Schwartzenegger, Zoltan will be back, as will Kanu and Joe Kamara from African Nations Cup duty, eventually, and while not wanting to chuck cold water on Nigeria's hopes of securing the trophy, the sooner the better for my money.

So, in a parody of ?The Life Of Brian?, then, what has Jeremy Peace ever done for us? Discarding on a temporary basis my personal views regarding creeping commercialisation and corporate sponsorship ripping the real heart out of clubs ? not strictly relevant to the debate, as I currently see it, although I do reserve the right to publicly criticise our chairman?s record on similar issues from time to time ? these are my thoughts on the subject, right or wrong. Since taking over, he has signed no less than 32 players for the club, all of varying ability. Of those signed principally when Gary Megson was in charge, we still have Koumas, currently on loan to Cardiff, of course, Paul Robinson, Tommy Gaardsoe, Ronnie Wallwork, and Geoff Horsfield.

After that ?first wave?, immediately prior to Megson?s departure and not long afterwards, he then brought in Our Pole In Goal, Kuscszak, a truly inspired capture, whose current track record speaks for itself, of course, Ricardo Scimeca, Zoltan Gera, Kanu, Kevin Campbell, Rob Chaplow, Kieran Richardson, on loan, and Jonathan Greening, Also on the ?shopping list? around that time were Martin Albrechtson, Juanichi Inamoto, Darren Purse, and Rob Earnshaw. This season has also seen the arrival of Joe Kamara, Nathan Ellington, Darren Carter, Chris Kirkland, Curtis Davies and Steve Watson at the club.

Picking through the bones of that little lot is instructive. Those I still have profound misgivings over include Ellington, whose recent form, Bradford City apart, has been disappointing, quite frankly. Had we still got Jason Roberts at the club, how well would he have responded to Robson?s much more laid-back and intelligent management style, I wonder? Carter? What precise function he?s supposed to serve, be it defensive, midfield, attacking or what, I've yet to properly ascertain. How and why he still features so prominently in Robson?s plans is a complete and utter mystery to me The naughty but droll thought of him really being our manager?s secret love-child and therefore totally ?bomb-proof? has crossed my mind on more than one whimsical occasion these last few games.

Earnshaw, I believe, has been very badly advised by someone, somewhere. If he sincerely wants to find a future for himself that involves the Premiership, then a person, (or persons) he really respects should be quietly whispering into his shell-like ear by now. You don't get the dream move you want by getting into a huge sulk, then, when finally given a decent chance to prove to prospective buyers what you can do out there, as per Reading, make a point of really emphasising your distinct lack of enthusiasm for either club or manager. That's really going to set that telephone ringing, isn't it?

As for Horsfield and Campbell, honest and hard-working professionals both, they served us well last season, played no small part in keeping us up, for which I was duly grateful, but isn?t it now high time they both adjusted to the old ?pipe and slippers by the fireplace? routine? Experience and wisdom they both have in have in heaps, but as far as real pace up front is concerned, a prime commodity in strikers at this level, they both have very little in the tank save fond memories of times gone by. Of the rest, those on my list who can?t quite cut the mustard by then, but are not out-and-out dipsticks ? you know who they are, as well as I do - I reckon most will be out of the club ere the next time summer?s leafy boughs once more provide us with pleasantly-dappled shade.

Now for a quick look at those we should be nurturing, not neutering via the ?two large bricks sharply brought together? method outlawed by most animal welfare organisations. Both Paul Robinson and Ronnie Wallwork are now regarded as Albion success stories, although the latter had no end of problems when a dramatic loss of form led to some sections of the Hawthorns crowd giving the lad a bit of a torrid time both during our second promotion season, and the Premiership one immediately thereafter. I guess yesterday?s mass outbreak of booing when Robbo decided to take him off speaks volumes for the massive change of popular opinion there?s been these last few months regarding the lad?s true abilities. Of Robson?s current crop, I do see Chaplow primarily as one for the future. The lad's got real ability, and is still learning the game. His time, I reckon, will come some 18 months or 2 years further down the line. Whether or not we'll still be in the Prem when that time finally comes is a moot point, of course.

As we saw yesterday, Inamoto can blow both hot and cold out there. Truly brilliant on his day, but come the next fixture, you find yourself wanting the Japanese Embassy to do the honourable thing, and provide both obligatory hara-kiri sword and full bottle of sake. Greening? Similarly capricious form, similar potential, but better played on the left, maybe? Curtis Davies is class, pure and simple, took to the Prem like a duck to water, he did. Chris Kirkland, another loan signing, has found himself in the unfortunate position of being second-bested by a comparative unknown, The Pole In Goal. The way it stands at the moment, custodially-speaking, our Scouse import will now have the devil of a job knocking our current first-choice stopper off his lofty perch. The huge success of our current keeper has also served to highlight the fact that although operating to a tight budget, shopping in flea-markets, especially East European ones, does have its advantages, sometimes. The Pole In Goal, and Zoltan Gera, who came to us in a similar manner, of course, both go to show that bargain-basement former Eastern-bloc signings aren?t necessarily a potential pig-in-the-poke for purchasing clubs.

Zoltan?s success as a Baggie also demonstrates that although Albion were taking a hell of a risk by signing him in the first place ? Gera?s recent past is absolutely littered with various unfortunate and embarrassing issues, the severity of which would have made the average club run a mile in the opposite direction ? the constant high standard of his play has more than amply rewarded our football club for showing him both faith and support at the time he needed it most.

As you can see, quite a mixed bag we?ve got, but on the whole, I regard it as a transfer record more on the ?credit? side than the converse. Given his somewhat illustrious past playing history, Robbo must surely have a 'contacts' list about as long as my right arm stashed away somewhere. Wigan managed to sign Neil Mellor, a reserve player I rate very highly indeed, on loan from Liverpool just a few days ago. Why weren't we in there pitching, I wonder? And, thinking of an institution much, much closer to our current manager's beating heart, why haven't we asked Fergie if there's a young striker there that might want to get a little bit of guaranteed first team football under their belt? Kieran Richardson's first team prospects at United improved in leaps and bounds after that three or four month spell he had with us, and, of course, the benefit cut two ways, insofar as Richardson's skills played no small part in keeping us up. Per haps now is the time for calling in one or two favours more.

The blame for yesterday is not necessarily to be lain exclusively at the feet of either our manager or Jeremy Peace's, for that matter. What really counts right now is what we actually propose to do to address the problems that undoubtedly exist. Above all, yesterday?s farce has well and truly highlighted the fact we?re truly desperate for someone capable of banging in some goals. I suspect a lot of this is down to confidence, a valuable commodity certain of our players aren?t exactly blessed with right now. Sort that over the period of time when we have strikers involved in the Nations Cup and you?ve well and truly saved yourselves from a nasty little media-driven kicking.

At least yesterday?s defeat, plus the horribly-huge embarrassment factor surrounding it, may well have the welcome knock-on effect of pushing our chairman into trying to address the issue more hastily than he would have done had we not been returned to the mire once more. As I said before, the solution to this vexing problem probably lies in both the hands of the scouts, and the pristine chequebook of our chairman. Find the hidden striking talent currently kicking its heels in the reserves, give them a reasonable chance of banging in the goals for you, and the rest will surely follow.

And Finally?. Just to cheer you all up, a couple of gems culled from the dusty pages of the Midland Chronicle archives over the last few days. Believe it or not, rather than being the halcyon front-doors-unlocked period Daily Mail readers steadfastly maintain to be relatively free from crime, back in 1934, the magistrates courts at Oldbury, Smethwick and West Bromwich were all going full blast. Not only did I unearth several serial joy-riders, one of whom was a teenage girl, believe it or not, I also came across some really unpleasant muggings (called ?robbery with violence? at that time). The court case that really had me giggling, though, was one that came before the magistrates, and involved the theft from a lorry of a quantity of Bovril jars. Yes, I do know the savoury brown gunge to be a wonderfully-warming thing to drink on a cold day ? but an unbelievable SIX TONS of the stuff?

My second ?criminal record? tonight concerns two householders, both of whom were prosecuted for allowing their chimneys to catch fire. (No, I didn?t know it was a criminal offence to do so either until the time I first began researching newspaper records!) Both the accused householders lived in close proximity to each other, and in housing built to more or less the same standard; that being the case, both fireplaces and chimneys were as peas in a pod as far as the reader was concerned. The magistrates duly heard the evidence, found both cases proven, each householder being ordered to pay a fine ? and that?s when the fun started. Neither had any ?previous? for the offence, but one householder ended up paying just four quid, and the other five! As one quite reasonably commented afterwards, did that mean the chemical content of the black smoke still billowing out of one chimney to be much more objectionable than its close counterpart situated just a few doors further down the street?

 - Glynis Wright

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