The Diary

27 August 2004: The Day The Belly Streaked Ahead At Colchester

Greetings once more, and boy, was I cream-crackered by the time I?d finally wrapped up yesterday. Finishing this diary at the unearthly hour of 3.30 a.m. is not conducive towards getting some zeds, may I say. What with that, and replying to some mails I?d received late yesterday, it was nearer four in the morning by the time I managed to turn in ? and because of post-match hyperactivity, proper sleep mostly eluded me. The problem with matches is that when watching our finest in mortal combat, each and every one of my five senses gets heavily involved in what?s going on out there on the pitch, and so do most of my endocrine glands. How much adrenaline is expended by this column in the line of Baggie duty doesn?t bear thinking about, really. Any aspiring Ph.D students wanting to find out are quite welcome to make ruddy great holes in my veins ? for a fee! It?s fair to say that come the end of the allotted span, I customarily end up feeling as though I?ve covered every blade of grass and kicked every ball out there as well. Bearing that in mind, the end result wasn?t all that surprising. I was rather late getting up this morning and had to postpone my trip to the Shrine to pick up Liverpool tickets ? yep, they?re on sale now, and it?s not my imagination, this time, thank goodness! ? so I?ll be doing just that tomorrow morning.

A few more comments about our long haul to Colchester for what?s now known as the Carling Cup, but will always be the League Cup to old throwbacks like myself and The Fart! What with that, and an away trip to Newcastle the same week, it?ll feel as though we?ve travelled the length and breadth of the country to support the lads ? Alan Whicker, Henry Kissinger, eat your hearts out. Will we take it seriously, or will we simply put out a second-string, I wonder? Although Albion haven?t said anything officially as yet, Colchester have already announced that they are going to make it all-ticket for away supporters, and possibly home ones as well; their max is around 800, apparently, with only around 200 able to sit.

Presumably, away season-ticket holders will get first shout, but I can?t believe for a minute that every Baggie holding one will want to go. It?s midweek, it?s a competition in which some may have little interest, and we?ve got an almighty (not to mention expensive) trip to St. James?s Park coming up just a few days later. I just hope that those who do go are given a side worthy of such loyal support ? it would be particularly annoying to go all that way and find we?re being sold short, although, our manager might find himself presented with something of a dilemma there. Do you go all-out to progress, on the slight chance of going all the way to the final, winning, getting into Europe, but take the risk of possibly being relegated because of not having a full squad available due to injury, or do you make minimal effort to progress, annoy the faithful, but keep all your brave little soldiers pretty-much intact for the Premiership fray? It?s all about priorities, I suppose. I wonder where ours lie for this one?

Thoughts of Colchester turn back the clock to the times when we?ve played them recently, both in that competition, and in a pre-season friendly. The League Cup encounter (Buckley was manager then, I think) was particularly maddening. Remember a guy called Mark Kinsella? Yep, he was the one who perpetrated the damage. Over the two legs we lost, and in spectacular fashion at The Hawthorns, if my memory serves me correctly. The pre-season friendly? My memories of this game centre not around the standard of the football (dire!), but the fact that as I was busily taking photos behind the goal, sitting on the perimeter of the pitch and generally minding my own business, one of our supporters (The Belly, ?Im Indoors just reminded me!) took it upon himself to literally leap right over my little head, and run onto the pitch like a whippet on acid.

That wouldn?t have mattered two hoots had it not been for the fact the guy was stark rollock naked at the time. It?s not all that often you?re treated to the sight of someone?s dangly bits doing precisely that inches from the top of your head ? it?s a bit of a shock, to say the least - but had those vital bits of reproductive tissue hit my camera as our Baggie did his naturist acrobatics, I really do dread what would have happened to his precious gonads and, by inference, his manhood. Mind you, the pictures I got were dead good, but because of the nature of the beast, I didn?t dare print them. Did I thrust ?em under the ? erm - nose of my beloved for comparative purposes? Ah, that would be telling, wouldn?t it!

Back to last night, then. Sadly, the cold light of day revealed that The Fart?s little snippet of info was duff, but that?s the thing when you get rumours like that going around like wildfire. Sometimes they check out, and sometimes you look totally daft. It?s how those ?rumour? columns work on Fleet Street: 99.9% of their copy is rubbish, and they know it, but occasionally, they strike oil, get it dead right ? and the rare occasions they do more than make up for the numerous times they simply crash and burn. Dindane? We?re still in suspenders over that one, according to the E and S; we?ve allegedly offered ?5 million for his services, but Anderlecht seem to be holding out for a lot more before they?ll part with their unhappy player. According to reports, the player himself is not best pleased about what?s happening, as he still wants away. Alarmingly (ironically?) one press agency reports tonight that Spurs are sniffing now, so we might well get gazumped right at the last despite all the effort we?ve put in to obtain his services. Or is that just his agent trying to get us to bite? The trouble is also, because of his international commitments, effectively, we only have a couple of days to get his signature on the dotted line; after that, he?ll be over the transfer deadline, and it?ll be a case of ?Goodnight, Vienna?. Until January, that is.

Mind you, the mere fact we?ve been prepared to push the boat out to that extent to grab such a talented player can only bode well for our future. As long as I?ve been a Baggie (I?m in my 41st season) rightly or wrongly, it?s been my perception that the major factor holding us back has always been our seeming unwillingness to go the extra monetary mile to get the talent we need to progress. It doesn?t need me to remind you of occasions when this has seemed to be the case, and it was a cause of major irritation to me when we were last in the Prem two seasons ago. My feeling at that time was that had we taken a few gambles then, the need to expend great quantities of blood, toil, tears and sweat in the Nationwide last season might not have arisen ? but with hindsight, I can also see why the club were so chary of doing so at the time. The awful financial example provided by the likes of Leeds United and Bradford would have been a major disincentive to be profligate, I suppose.

One thing that did surprise me on picking up emailed comments about last night?s game was the opinion that some thought we were boring. I have to disagree, personally; I found the entire encounter a most thrilling affair, and was absolutely and utterly riveted to my seat for the entire 90 minutes. Now some thoughts about our players. As I said yesterday, it was quite brave of our leader to risk chucking on young Dyer at that stage of the game, but that?s the only way you learn. It?s one thing to pulverise defences in Division One, but it?s quite another matter entirely to wow ?em in the Prem. Never mind, though, give him a couple of games, and I?m sure young Lloyd will come through. I?m still wondering as to how the lad was made Man Of The Match, though. I thought there were several much more deserving candidates on that pitch last night. Is it still the case that the executive box holders vote who gets the nod? That?s the way it used to be in the faraway days when The Noise did the box commentaries - or have we moved on since those days? Should that be the case, then, who does decide?

Houlty? Having now seen the goal on TV, I have to conclude it was one of the few moments when our keeper cocked up, but in view of the couple of fine saves he made before and after to keep us in there and kicking, I really can?t bring myself to verbally beat him up about it. Remember also, we?re up against a different class of attacker, now, and our defence are still on a learning curve. A keeper is only as good as what he has immediately in front of him; last season, our rearguard was rock-solid, this time round, through no fault of our own, we?re finding things a tad more difficult.

Gera? Further comment superfluous. Kanu? Shame that lovely overhead kick didn?t count; I still haven?t seen a replay of that incident, but the consensus seems to be pretty much that it was offside, so I?ll just have to go with the flow on that one, I guess. The Horse does annoy me at times; had he tried to beat the ?other? Paul Robinson to the ball instead of looking for the penalty, we might have taken the lead once more. Clem had a pretty solid performance, but Greening and Robinson I?m still not totally sure about. Although Greening did most of what he had to do with great competence, and moving to the middle was an improvement, there was, if I recall correctly, an incident when he could have given the whole thing away for us by losing the ball at a vital moment. Robinson is an able defender, nothing more, nothing less, and to try to make him something he is not is bordering on lunacy, in my opinion. AJ looked a little out of his depth, sadly, and I wasn?t surprised he was taken off in the second half. Once more, Gaardsoe and Purse both looked made for this division; while Purse has recent top-flight experience with our local rivals, Tommy hasn?t, but after just three games at this level, seems to have taken to it like a duck to water.

The final verdict? We deservedly took the lead, bossed things for a fair part of the first half, before Spurs finally found their sea-legs, then were lucky to hang on during that opening second-half spell when the visitors seemingly chucked half of MFI?s kitchen sink stock at us. On reflection, I?m inclined to go with Meggo that it was a point won rather than two lost ? but we do have to keep things in proportion. As I commented last night, two seasons ago, and we?d have been slaughtered, no mistake. Three games gone, three points in the bag, which is just groovy, but it?s high time, now, we clock up that vital first victory. I?d like to think a distinctly Rooney-less Goodison will have us all bouncing around like little rubber balls come five o?clock on Saturday, but now, I?m not so certain. Sure, they?re in a mess, financially, but did I read on Ceefax tonight that someone anonymous had come in with an undisclosed financial donation to the club? Mind you, that sort of thing can go either way; people inclined to do that aren?t usually philanthropists, ragged-trousered or otherwise, and there may be hidden strings attached to all that largesse, ones the football side might not be all that enthusiastic about. Still, that?s their worry, not ours.

And finally?.. Good to read in last night?s programme that when Supporters Club Travel Secretary Dave Holloway took his merry band on a footie-watching jaunt to Scotland at the very end of last season, one of the travellers was none other than our old mate SuperBob, aka Bob Taylor, an Albion legend in his own lunchtime, of course. There aren?t all that many ex-players ? The King (and, since his death, his wife and family), and Bomber Brown are the only ones that readily spring to mind these days - who can justifiably claim they are, by adoption, truly ?one of ours? but what with this, and his trip to Blackburn with our following last time in the Prem, I guess Supes can certainly claim to be so now. What a lovely bloke, and welcome to the fold, Bob. And, not only that, former Baggie Derek McInnes organised a tour of Ibrox for our happy Baggies ? and, what?s more, travelled down from Dundee to be there when they looked around the place. Top man, say I.

 - Glynis Wright

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