The Diary

06 April 2004: A Merseyside Mauling!

Talk about ?After The Lord Mayor?s Show? ? yesterday, we were ultimate victors in a five-goal thriller, tonight, our reserves got hit for six by a rampant Liverpool side that included our tormentor of last season?s corresponding away fixture, Mellor. And, just to really rub it in, strong echoes of the six-goal stonking we got from their first-stringers at the Hawthorns last season. To be perfectly honest, it really could have been several more; luckily for us, the visitors seemed to take their foot off the gas pedal towards the end. Trouble was, we fielded quite a young side tonight; for whatever reason, quite a few of the usual suspects were absent from our line-up.

With any Liverpool side, first team, stiffs, or whatever, their predominant ethos is all about ?pass and move?, flowing football, none of that long-ball stuff for them, no sirree. And, right from the moment the ref put the whistle to his lips and blew to start things off, it quickly became clear the way their stall was set out. An absolute delight to watch, of course, but if you happen to be directly involved, sheer murder. What made things even worse was the fact that due to our current keeper crisis ? Murph will probably be needed for first team duties, unless Houlty undergoes a miraculous recovery over the next couple of days ? it?s a case of either playing kids between the sticks, or calling upon what little remaining ammo you still have in the locker, in this case, Dan ?Bigfoot? Crane. Having said that, I really was surprised to see him still at the club. After that series of spectacular gaffes versus Villa reserves at their place ? we lost by a five-goal margin, and even at a conservative estimate, I would say Dan was responsible for at least three of them, comically so, which didn?t help one little bit ? I?d genuinely thought that by doing so, he?d compiled his own Albion career RIP. You would have thought Bigfoot would have seen in tonight?s game a good opportunity to restore his reputation to a state of grace. Sadly, it didn?t work out that way; as Danny was directly responsible for at least two of those strikes, and embarrassingly so, believe you me! Crazy, especially as Danny managed to pull off some top-notch saves for Scouse efforts that truly looked a lost cause, but was hopelessly beaten, and excruciatingly so, by stuff he should have been able to deal with in his sleep. One other thing puzzles me, though; why on earth didn?t our third-choice keeper, Simon Miotto, get a game tonight? Don?t tell me he?s fallen victim to The Curse Of The Albion Keeper as well?

It wasn?t all bad, though. There was one, no, make that two, highlights for us, and they came in the form of the brace we got by way of reply, the first in around the 14th minute, and the second in around the 85th. Those who made the long trek to Portman Road yesterday, and watched as Jason Koumas levelled the scores, will find themselves on very familiar ground, here. The scenarios were dead similar; a foul on the edge of the box, a stoutly-constructed defensive wall, but instead of our Welsh international midfielder stepping up to take the free-kick, what we had instead was our Senegalese international to take aim and fire. And, just like yesterday, the kicker, Alasse N?Dour, put an almighty swerve on the ball you just wouldn?t believe, and it pleasingly plopped right into the back, at a rate of knots, as sweet as a nut, and, just like yesterday, in the top right-hand corner, too! For the second, you would have thought that Liverpool would have learned by that mistake, but nope. Once more, Alasse did his thing ? and once more, their keeper found himself flailing wildly at thin air, and on the same side of the goal as well! Two cracking efforts, which were an absolute delight to watch, and more than made up for the magnitude of tonight?s defeat.

I have to say it was wonderful to go to The Shrine tonight, and find the place still buzzing because of yesterday?s marvellous win. There really is a belief and a ?buzz? about the place that we?re going to make it, and on the face of it, I reckon it?s going to take something really spectacular to make us stuff up at this late stage. I had thought it was remotely possible for ?it? to have happened by the time we play Sunderland at their place, but looking more closely at the mathematics tells me that even if they lose all three of those outstanding games over the next seven days, then it?s still not a nailed-on cert. Share the points with them, though, or grab all three up there, and it might just be all over bar the shouting, or little geeky blokes slaving over a hot calculator and solemnly declaring that there still remains 0.34567 (or diddly-squat) of a chance our rivals can still do it. No, it could well be the Bradford game?s going to be ?the one?, assuming we can carry on the good work achieved at Ipswich yesterday. Hopefully, The Gills will curl up and die, and so will The Lions; they?ve got much bigger fish to fry right now, and two key players possibly on the sidelines come Easter Monday. Incidentally did I hear on the radio tonight that Millwall might be prevented from competing in Europe next season due to manager Denis Wise?s lack of ?proper? coaching qualifications? If that?s right, then the phrase, ?stitched up like a kipper? won?t be the half of it. I may not be one of the East London Club?s biggest fans, but I do know ?the term ?mutual self-interest? when I hear it, albeit in disguised form.

Dwelling further on the subject of Millwall in Europe, I reckon The Noise had it about right in what he said to me shortly after we arrived in Ipswich yesterday. The way his thought processes were going, he wondered what would happen if The Lions drew Turkish club Galatasaray at some stage! It?s certainly a thought; I?d already reckoned that should Millwall prove triumphal yesterday, someone in the Foreign Office would be on the blower to Hans Blix quicker than an unmarked Lee Hughes running onto a through-ball in the box! Returning to The Noise?s original thought once more, just what would happen should that sorry state of affairs come to pass? Simple, I reckon; Mutually Assured Destruction, as per Cold War nuclear deterrence theory!

Now the dust?s finally settled on yesterday?s game, time to reflect upon who was particularly outstanding for us. Houlty did OK before he was taken off at the interval, Greegs was superb, as per usual these days, AJ ran and ran, as is his wont, Tommy Gaardsoe dealt with pretty-much everything that came his way (incidentally, didn?t those Ipswich supporters give him heaps of applause when he emerged from the players? tunnel just before the start?), Big Dave was ? erm ? Big Dave! ? but, for me, the bloke who exerted the most influence on that game was Jason Koumas. Not only did he score himself, his inch-perfect pass to Hughsie was instrumental in setting The Horse up for that late, late winner. Dropping him for a couple of games seems to have worked like a charm; now he?s got to scrap with Sakiri for a place, he knows there?s no such thing as a free lunch at The Shrine any more. Lloyd Dyer? Once more, his substitution turned the game, with the added bonus of him scoring. My worry is that with him being out of contract at the end of this season, there?s been little or nothing from the club about any efforts made to sign him up. Of one thing I?m sure; if he walks, there?s going to be a queue of potential buyers stretching halfway down Halfords lane. Not to mention a phalanx of very annoyed Albion supporters! Assuming we do sort out the contract thing eventually, could he make it in the Prem? You can never tell how young and inexperienced players will cope with the demands of the higher league, but I?d sure as hell like to see him given the chance to find out! His main asset is that greyhound-like speed of his when he gets the ball, and an acceleration that leaves a fair number of opposing defenders completely for dead. It?s a dying art, having a class act like that; the last Baggie I saw with such crowd-pleasing ability was Laurie Cunningham, almost thirty years ago. I?d like to think the lad can adapt; after all, entertaining wingers are something of an Albion tradition. Fingers crossed, the lad will make it.

Anyone out there know what to make of that alleged bust-up in the tunnel at the end of yesterday?s game? I just couldn?t believe it when I opened my paper and read that none other than Big Dave was one of the participants, the other being an Ipswich player. According to the blurb, our manager had to separate the two combatants, and one report says a steward was slightly hurt as well. I don?t think the referee will be including the incident in his report, but I now hear that the local rozzers are involved because of the steward?s injury. Just what the hell brought that lot on, anyway? Sure, I know Big Dave?s one hell of a size, but he?s a ?gentle giant? sort of bloke, and not the type to go wading in with both fists blazing. And on the Sabbath as well! Tut, tut ? I wonder if ?Big ?G??s well and truly noted that one in his little black book for further use against him come the time Dave finally shuffles off his mortal coil?

That injury to Russell still worries me, though. Amazingly enough, the club are still talking in terms of him recovering sufficiently to take part in the Gillingham game come this Saturday. Is his presence still so absolutely vital to our push for The Prem? Sure, I realise that Murph has weaknesses that are Russell?s strengths ? failure to dominate his area, for example, which indirectly led to that controversial Ipswich equaliser ? but that sort of thing can and must be sorted out during training over the coming days. Possibly, our defenders might have to share some responsibility for that one, not through any real fault of their own, just the fact that after working with Houlty for so many games, what Murph does when under pressure might not be so familiar to them. Sure, Russell himself might be very reluctant to yield up his place at this stage of proceedings, which I fully understand, but there comes a time when you have to weigh up what?s best for the side and best for yourself. No-one from the club?s going to be around to assist in 20 years time when possible complications begin to manifest themselves, so why not see sense now and let Murph take centre stage?

I didn?t tune into the Leeds-Leicester game tonight as I was slaving over a hot PC compiling this on my return from tonight?s game, but by all accounts, those punters had quite a thriller going out there. Leeds went two goals up during the first half, Leicester got both goals back during the second, and with around three minutes to go, were looking good for a point ? then up popped the Yorkshire club to completely ruin their evening for them! 3-2 was the score, so that really does land The Dingles in it, now. Me? I?m absolutely delighted, for the simple reason I have no wish whatsoever to reacquaint myself with their brain-dead element next season. If things go according to plan, we shall both pass like ships in the night, and that?s the way I want it. Bye, Dingles!

Back again on Friday night, when Sunderland will have played two of those outstanding fixtures of theirs, and by which time we might have a better idea of how much of a threat to our ambitions they still are. Hopefully, they?ll have dropped some points along the way, which will give us further incentive to well and truly sort our Gillingham the next day. See you then.

And finally?. There?s a headline in today?s E and S announcing the arrival in Wolverhampton of the first circus there for 30 years. Funny, that, I could have sworn black was blue there?d always been one at Molineux, and currently with enough animals in the seats to keep an average zoo in business for years, a ringmaster conveniently sitting in the home dug-out, and eleven complete clowns performing on the pitch there every fortnight!

 - Glynis Wright

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