The Diary

20 April 2003: Some More Post-Sunderland Thoughts

Well, now that the hullabaloo of yesterday's unexpected win at Sunderland has died down, it's time to take stock - and not the sort purveyed by Messrs. Knoor, either. At approximately ten to five on Saturday afternoon, the hangman pulled the trap lever and we disappeared into the darkness below with a sickening 'thud'. As Anc said via email yesterday, "I'm glad it's all over." I couldn't agree more. You can love a relative suffering from a terminal illness, and yet, when they finally expire after much suffering over pain-racked months and years, one can still declare much the same thing as Anc and not be accused of callous words or behaviour. Anyone with a grain of common sense will understand what you've been through, also your immediate family, and rejoice also that death has ended that suffering.

It's the same for our club; sure, it's sad we've dropped, but on the other hand, it's a merciful release. I suppose those of a similar mindset to that of Alan Green, Rodney Marsh, Danny Baker and Co. will be laughing their socks off - we certainly didn't fit into the monetary or cultural mould pre-cast for us by those pundits - but even as we disappear below their radar around three weeks from now, it's my belief that many supporters of clubs in the Greed League will regard our departure with some sorrow. At most away venues this season, we've had numerous home followers say to us how marvellous our support has been; for sheer noise, loyalty and commitment to the cause, we've pretty-much whopped other sides' followers hands down and maybe given some of those 'theatre audiences' we've encountered on our lung-busting travels something to think about as well.

So, what for the future? If I had any say in the matter, my immediate goal would be trying to restore some respectability to our final points-tally. Yesterday's win means we'll avoid emulating Watford's feat of taking the drop with the least number of points ever recorded, but there's still that embarrassing chasm between us and West Ham, who are looking more rocky than ever. At least, with the pressure off, there may be a better chance of richer pickings. Tomorrow, we play Liverpool; as we saw at Anfield, their form can be somewhat erratic at times; if they happen to be in end-of-term mode tomorrow, there might be something juicy to pick off the bones. The same goes for Tottenham, not the most consistent of sides, I have to say. As far as the long-term is concerned, we had some indication of our manager's thoughts via a Capital Gold interview the other day. Interesting?

I'm relying on second-hand accounts here, as I didn't hear the broadcasts for myself, but I have seen several abridged versions of what was said, agreed accurate by common consent. It's interesting to note that Meggo reckons he's been doing the job with his arms tied behind his back, and now it's time he does the job how he wants, and is backed to that effect. A veiled threat, I suppose, but I really do have trouble believing he really means what he says. On those occasions we've interviewed Board members for the fanzine, the overall impression I got was that everything at the club was geared towards keeping Gary happy. Whatever he wants, within reason, he can have. The other bit that surprised me was his assertion it's time to get as many good players as he can and forget the consequences. Is Gary suggesting here that we get ourselves in financial hock to the extent, say, of Bradford, or Coventry, in order to bring in fresh talent to facilitate our return to the bright lights? We chuck caution to the wind, and take a gamble on everything turning out right on the night?

Although I'm firmly of the belief that had we been slightly more daring in our transfer ventures during the January 'window' we might have made a better fist of staying up, I really can't believe he's seriously advocating that strategy. According to some figures I saw in one of the Sunday tabloids today, in a 'League table' showing the amount of debt currently blighting the affairs of various Premiership clubs, ours is fourth from top. With ?2.5 million profit showing, only Southampton, Liverpool and Man U (natch!) have done better. At least, when we go into The Nationwide, we'll be in much better fiscal shape than some, and certainly better than fellow-travellers Sunderland, who will surely have to sell their best players to keep the spectre of the bank manager away from their place. The same goes for West Ham, who seem doomed also, and are double-figures-millions in the red. Although we are in the black ourselves, even so, I suspect one or two of our better performers will quickly take the Metro to New Street Station and richer pickings.

There is another factor at play here, and it's our manager's ability to calculate his indiscretions to several decimal places before letting journos, radio or otherwise, into his little ginger-nutted life. You can accuse our manager of anything you like, but I doubt if anyone would be so foolish as to place 'crass stupidity' on the charge-sheet as well. In the days when we were allowed to attend Press Conferences, many was the time Gary would say something to the media, all the while with that 'I-know-something-you-don't' look plastered all over his face. I really would hate to play him at poker, be it the conventional sort or otherwise. Is there a hidden agenda at work here? It's difficult to figure out what it might be; I can't see PT returning, unless Jeremy Peace gets bored with the whole thing and gives up his shares. I can't see Gary moving on to better things, either, as: a) A move to another Nationwide outfit would be seen as a retrograde step b) His frequent lack of both man-management skills, and tactical sophistication wouldn't exactly endear him to the sort of pampered Continentals who inhabit the Prem's more heady regions. One really good paint-stripping outburst from our leader, and they'd be running back home to mum with their tails between their legs within milliseconds..

Assuming we are wedded to Meggo for the duration, I suppose a lot will depend upon how we fare during those six or seven opening games next time round. To show we really mean business and scare the pants off our fellow-contenders, we really have to set a blistering pace over that period. The trouble is, to do that, you need quality performers in situ; assuming we can keep class acts like Jason Koumas or Russell Hoult down on the farm - they've seen Gay Paree, remember - someone's going to have to start banging in some goals. Is the confidence of our current strikeforce now too shot to come up with the goods? I would hope that the downshift would benefit both Hughsie and Jason Roberts, and give Scott Dobie a chance to regain form also; it's a given those players would give it everything, but sometimes, through no fault of the players concerned, 'everything' can fall somewhat short of the mark. Remember, also, it's not only the reputation of the players that's on the line here, it's Meggo's street-cred also. If our manager can reinvent himself sufficiently to win back the confidence of some of his charges - I think you'll get my drift - then our chances of bouncing straight back will increase in direct proportion. If he can't?

A very long 'and finally'? At last, a piece of news to gladden our ears! After much pestering of club officials, who clearly didn't 'speaka-da-language' on those occasions The Fart and I tried to wheedle the info out of them, details of our pre-season tour have now emerged in the Evening Mail courtesy of that nice Mr. Lepkowski. Incidentally, Chris, now you've finished with them both, can I have my thumbscrew and rack back? Just wash the bloodstains off first, there's a good fellow; my sex life hasn't been the same without them! Seriously, though, these are the details - no dates, yet, unfortunately - as revealed unto us by The Old Fart late last night, so hang on to your hats, clear your diaries; this is it?

Apparently, we are to return to Demark once more, based in Copenhagen, and taking in four games while we're there - I guess our old friends Greve (now upwardly-mobile by one division since our last visit) will be included in that little lot. Anybody reading this who fancies a week-long summer break with a Baggies connection, get those Euros in stock and start checking out cheapo flights ASAP. A great giggle is guaranteed by all - for three years on the bounce, Greve's supporters proved to be fantastic hosts - and if you smile nicely at Benny, one of their lads, he'll demonstrate several interesting things to do with Danish sausage in a bread roll! The Tingstedt Bar in Greve town centre, just five minutes walk from the station and fifteen minutes stagger to the ground, is a perfect venue for pre-match potations. Copenhagen is a wonderful city, and safe with it, therefore it's ideal for a family break. Culture? Loads of it - the Danish capital was home to Hans Christian Andersen, he of the childrens' stories, physicist Neils Bohr did the preliminary research into nuclear fission at the University, and the place positively ripples with lovely mediaeval buildings. For those more interested in maintaining their blood-alcohol levels, there's even a guided tour of the Carlsberg brewery. Oh, and the Little Mermaid's there also, stuck in the harbour and covered with seaweed, poor thing. The city's also pervaded with waterways aplenty - a bit like the Black Country, I suppose; try the canal tour to get an overview of the city's attractions before exploring what really floats your boat.

Once we've sampled their excellent sausages and taken in a bit of footie along the way, it's a return to Blighty, and more familiar opposition; the teams lined up for our delectation this time round are Plymouth, Swindon, Wrexham and Cheltenham. Sorry, I don't know the dates yet, apart from the Plymouth one, which will be played the Saturday before it all starts for real in the Nationwide. If anyone can assist in that department, please let me know and I'll do the rest on here. Plymouth's always a pleasant place to go to watch a bit of footie; the delights there include The Hoe, where you can either sit and watch the Royal Navy go by, or do Francis Drake impersonations; the choice is yours. We'll probably be making an overnighter of this one as Devon is seriously lovely at that time of year. As for Swindon, we've been there before, of course; the visit that stands out for me was that of Lee Hughes's first season at the club when our supporters, stuck as they were in an uncovered away end, were absolutely drenched by an icy-cold deluge of monsoon proportions coupled with what seemed to be a hurricane-force wind. So vile were the conditions, several Baggies were treated for hypothermia by the St. John's Ambulance people!

Wrexham's also an interesting one; not only is the present managerial incumbent there an ex-Baggie - Denis Smith, of course - the last time I travelled there for an Albion game was in the Watney Cup, circa 1970! The usual story: nice day, shame about the result! Cheltenham? Oh dear. Not so much because of the opposition, it's their manager I can't abide. A bit of a conditioned reflex, really - one sight of Mr. Looney aka Bobby Gould, and the transformation is instantaneous, from calm and rational one minute, to absolute blind rage the next. Those Baggies who weren't around during our third division days will probably find it hard to grasp precisely how much we detested the guy - his eccentricities included dragging an Albion supporter off the street following a defeat at Bournemouth, and making the poor sod listen to the rollicking he subsequently gave our finest, also making the whole first-team plus substitutes travel up to a game at Stockport on a minibus. Not because of financial difficulties, mind; the whole thing was meant as a 'bonding exercise'. Nice idea; shame it didn't work, we lost three-nil, thereby ending our feeble hopes of getting into the play-offs. Oh, and those programme notes he used to write were a masterpiece of incomprehensibility. I reckon both John Prescott and Dubya Bush had lessons from him before entering serious politics. Pre-season Gould-baiting? Moi? The thought never even entered my pretty little head, darlings?

 - Glynis Wright

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